would u deal if you was pregnant and the father was an alcoholic and drug addicted?
I’m 20 my boyfriends 21. We have been together off and on since I have been 15. We have found out I’m 5 weeks pregnant. My boyfriend struggles with indulging in alcohol and when he’s drunk it leads him to drugs. he got in a car reck and had to go to icu where he couldn’t even get out of his bed. He received a dui and already had warrents at the time. After that he changed and wanted to be clean so we got an apt together and have been there for 4 mnths. He has never acted terrible except foer last nite. He spent his entire check 400.00 dollars on alcohol and drugs in ONE night. I didn’t even see him and he blaming me and my dad that we stole 200 frm him. The day b4 he was drinking as well and told me he didn’t want a larger woman as his babys mom. I jus got my hair cutt and he said maybe he would be nicer if I didn’t look like a dike. He also too my bag of baby stuff frm rachels house who confirmed I was prgnant and riped the papers up as well as the diaper and threw the toy monkey and baby cup on the floor when the cup cracked. I don’t know if he’s scred about the baby and lashing out or what’s going on??? I went to my moms last night. I’m thinking abiut going back even though there is no room for me and this baby when it comes. I’m so confused. I don’t know what to do? What would you do?
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Comments
leave him – go back to ur parents, he is not a fit role model for your baby and sounds like he could be abusive!
I reckon he needs a time out, huge time, spend some time away from him, don’t contact him don’t bug him, let him cool off then when he can act like a an adult then talk to him and question him why he acted like a 15 year ancient for crying out loud…Maybe he is frightened? and the only way is to make him not as frightened his the drink and the drugs which is terrible.
LEAVE HIM…your top priority right now it taking care of the baby and yourself.
You need to go home, let your mom know what’s going on, I’m sure that even if she doesn’t have the room now she will make it. I don’t reckon she would want her daughter and grandchild to be around this loser and that’s what he is.
Do you want him to abuse your baby, maybe get drunk, high and violent and shake the baby to death? If mom doesn’t want to take you in you may want to look to place the baby up for adoption, it’s not honest to bring a baby into a situation like this, the baby is the innocent one. He’s a mess and until he really makes a change he will stay that way, you are young and have your whole life ahead and a baby isn’t a excellent thing until you are on your feet and don’t have to live with anyone. Get your stuff together, go back to school or get a job but please get away from him, if not for you then for your sweet innocent baby.
To hell with him! If my boyfriend disrespected me like that it would be the end. My boyfriend and I did party before I got pregnant but after we went completly sober and clean. No smoking or drinking. I gave him a choice either you stop what your doing or Im leaving and your not going to see your baby. That was it He stoped everything and has supported me ever since even through my mood swings! Which have been horrible!!!
I would leave his ass, give him a choice and if he chooses to drink and do drugs forget him. Your worth so much more respect than he is obviously willing to give.
I wouldnt place up with that at all. You can do so much better.
well if he hasn’t changed yet and he already knos ur pregnant i doubt he will..i kno us girls have the instinct to want to try and save guys but sometimes you just cant..i bet if you really question yourself this question youll kon the answer…..are you in like with him? or do you just like him becasue you’ve been together so long you dont kno any different…believe me you may reckon hes the last guy youll ever be with but its not right..and no guy is better tahn this guy..give him an ultimatum..either change or leave
i would get away from him first, then worry about the next steps. Do you want your child to grow up with that kind of influence? I would never let my child see that.
To be honest, I’d let him know that you aren’t going to tolerate this behavior and he can call you when he gets his act together.
GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM.
LEAVE HIM QUICK!!!!!!!! If you have your mom’s support you can get help and take care of you and your baby without him!! Thats ABUSE!!!
ok, first of all it doesn’t matter if he is frightened about the pregnancy and lashing out or not. If I were you I would reckon about some other options, like staying with a friend or something. Whatever you do, stay away from his crazy azz. He is obviously irresponsible, immature, and just crazy!! If he is doing all this crazy sh*t while your pregnant, imagine what it will be like once the baby is here!! Do you really want your precious baby to grow up seeing his dad treat his mom like that?? when I was small I saw my step-dad verbally abuse and hurt my mother all the time by doing dumb sh*t like that! He would even call me names and hurt me!! It’s not something pleasant to go through in life, trust me. Just leave him. If you do whats right, and try to live the right way, God will help make a way for you and that baby………..just pray on it. Pray for wisdom, strength, courage to walk away, and endurance for the long road ahead. Excellent luck to you!!
Also look into financial help with the baby. Alot of states have section 8 housing where you pay rent based on your income, like $50 a month or something. Try looking into medicaid, WIC, ***child support***, and TANF.Hope this helped you……..
I strongly believe that a kid should have a father and a mother, but do you really want that to be the role in your baby’s life???? Right now you probably haven’t bonded with that unborn child, but believe me in 9 months you will, and when you have that small one to take care of you will want NO HARM to be done to him, and your bf sounds like a loose ball!!
Leave him now. I know it can be very overwhelming but now you have to reckon of what is best for you and your baby (not necessarily what you “want” to do) but do the responsible and mature thing to do. You always have your family to count on and support you. But guys like your bf really shouldnt be around babies…there are way to many “accidents” waiting to happen
Excellent luck to you!
That sounds pretty scary. I would stay at your mom’s. You don’t need to be around all of that stress, violence, and abuse. Just be glad you have your mom’s house to go to. If I were you I would not voluntarily place myself into that environment. When he is sober, you should call him and let him know that IF he WANTS to be a part of you and your baby’s life he need to prove it with actions! Don’t let him just say sorry and be all sweet for a day, because the next week he will probably be doing the same thing again. Tell him he needs to go get help, because he obviously can’t keep this under control himself. I mean he did well for 4 months, but you are going to be having a baby now! He has to be able to support you both, and cannot be doing rash things like spending his whole paycheck on drugs/alcohol. Right now it is just verbal abuse, which hurts a lot, but don’t wait until it escalates into physical abuse. It sounds like he is just on the brink of hitting you- you said he threw stuff around. What if something happens to your baby- you would feel really stupid for letting yourself be with him again. Make sure he gets help! Don’t go back with him until then. He needs to prove with ACTIONS! A verbal promise is not stronger than his addiction.
Excellent luck and stay safe!
You need to leave. It’s not going to be any better once the baby comes.
What if he takes his rage out on your child?
And you need someone supportive, not someone who treats you like crap.
RUN!
Run as quick and as far as you can!
Without an active recovery plot, your boyfriend will be NO EXCELLENT for you, let alone for your baby. Do you and your baby a favor: RUN! Get away from him until he has been clean for at least 6 months. Then see if you and the father even have anything in common and see about ‘trying again’
I wish you the best of luck – remember you are now responsible for more than just yourself. That baby will and MUST come first for the next eighteen years or more….
Take care of YOU, so you can take care of that innocent small one!
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